Picking up the Pieces After the Betrayal of Cheating

Picking up the Pieces After the Betrayal of CheatingIt must be cellular: Men and women automatically feel humiliated when their partner cheats, even though they themselves have done nothing to be ashamed of.

Too often, people feel embarrassed for their partner’s behavior, whether it’s domestic violence, emotional abuse, drug or alcohol addiction, gambling, or sex addiction. Too often, those addicts and abusers shift the blame onto their wives and husbands. It’s called “blaming the victim.”

But the truth is that we are only responsible for our own behavior and others are responsible for theirs.

Betrayal is a devastating assault upon our ability to trust — to trust in ourselves, other people, our sense of justice, even God. It can affect our self-esteem, if we let it. For some people, the worst part of adultery is the dishonesty — sharing our life with someone whom we discover has been living a lie day in and day out. We start to doubt our own senses, let alone our own attractiveness. Who was he or she, really?

We go over in our mind past intimate moments and wonder what he or she was thinking. We recall clues and doubt that we dismissed, and wonder what we were thinking. When the truth finally comes out, along with the pain is a sense of relief, because it validates what we intuitively suspected. But then we wonder if he or she loved me all those years — was it all fake? Was I in love with a fraud? We can begin to distrust our judgment in the future. Can I trust or “love” again? Can I trust another man or woman?

When our partner was unfaithful with someone we know, care for and trust, we suffer betrayal by two people. Sadly, it happens that spouses betray one another with their mate’s housekeeper, best friend, or sibling. The pain of the double betrayal is horrendous.

Rebuilding trust can be a long process. Building bridges of empathy with each other can only begin when the betrayer takes responsibility. Sometimes, adultery is a symptom of problems in the marriage — a lack of open communication, sex, or emotional intimacy. Other times, it’s an act of anger or a way to stake out some freedom or independence in lieu of setting boundaries or expressing anger directly with one’s spouse. It can be viewed as an act of defiance.

That doesn’t mean it’s the other person’s fault. It means that the relationship itself and both partners need help in changing their communication patterns and developing a healthier intimate connection.

Addiction is rampant in America — our codependent country — and sex addiction is rarely talked about. An addict’s family life is built upon shame and secrecy that eats away at everyone’s self-esteem. We are never responsible for someone else’s behavior, nor does it reflect upon our worth. Only our actions reflect on us. If you’ve been betrayed, stop every self-doubt that creeps into your mind. Your value, and your self-respect, aren’t tarnished one iota.

Copyright Darlene Lancer 2014

Darlene LancerDarlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, specializing in relationships, codependency, and addiction. She has a broad range of experience, working with individuals and couples for more than twenty-five years. Her focus is on helping individuals overcome obstacles to leading fuller lives, and helping couples enhance their communication, intimacy, and passion. She is a speaker, freelance writer, and maintains private practice in Santa Monica, CA. For more information, see whatiscodependency.com, where you can also get the FREE ebook, “14 Tips for Letting Go.”

Find her book Codependency for Dummies at Amazon and Barnes and Noble. You can follow her on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/codependencyrecovery

APA Reference
Lancer, D. (2014). Picking up the Pieces After the Betrayal of Cheating. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 21, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/lib/picking-up-the-pieces-after-the-betrayal-of-cheating/00018785

Scientifically Reviewed
    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 6 Feb 2014
    Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.

Keeping Good Boundaries & Getting Your Needs Met

Keeping Good Boundaries & Getting Your Needs MetYou may be familiar with the psychological term “boundaries,” but what does it mean and how does it apply to you?

Put plainly, boundaries are the line between where I end and you begin. Healthy boundaries define who we are in relation to others. They also help us to know what the extents and limits are with others. Personal boundaries are how we teach people who we are and how we would like to be handled in relationships. Boundaries help you to say, “This is who I am.”

Good personal boundaries protect you. Without them life feels scary and you may feel anxious. Having a sense of boundaries and limits also helps you to connect with your true self. They are based on your beliefs, thoughts, feelings, decisions, choices, wants, needs, and intuitions. They are clear, firm, maintained, and sometimes flexible.

Ultimately, when you don’t protect or overprotect your boundaries, your needs go unmet, which can lead to anxiety or compulsive behaviors such as overeating, addictions, or working too much. Setting healthy boundaries allows you to connect with yourself, your emotions and your needs. It allows you to feel safe, to relax and to feel empowered to care for yourself.

Loose Boundaries Lead to Emotional Drain

When boundaries are loose, you may easily take on the emotions and needs of others. There is a little sense of a separate self and you may experience difficulty identifying your own emotions and needs. People with loose boundaries often are hypersensitive to others’ comments and criticisms.

Common signs of loose boundaries include overinvolvement in others’ lives; perfectionism and people pleasing; trying to fix and control others with judgments and advice; staying in unhealthy relationships; taking on too much work or too many commitments; and avoiding being alone too much. When your boundaries are too loose you can feel responsible for everything and everyone, powerless, imposed upon, and resentful.

Unconsciously, loose boundaries may represent your own need for caretaking. Ultimately, however, they disconnect you from yourself as you’re not connected with your own emotions and needs. The disconnection can lead to compulsive behaviors such as overeating and working too much.

Rigid Boundaries Lead to Loneliness

For some people, too much closeness is anxiety-provoking. Intimacy may be frightening due to fears of being suffocated and the loss of independence. Some may also avoid connection with themselves due to a harsh internal critic. Feelings of emptiness and depression may be present, along with difficulty giving and receiving care and concern.

Ultimately, rigid boundaries can lead to chronic feelings of loneliness. It can be a double-edged sword – craving connection while fearing closeness. Rigid boundaries represent a protection from vulnerability, where hurt, loss and rejection can occur and be especially painful.

Here are some signs that your boundaries need adjusting:

  • Feel unable to say no
  • Feel responsible for others’ emotions
  • Concerned about what others think to the point of discounting your own thoughts, opinions and intuition
  • Your energy is so drained by something that you neglect your own needs (including the need for food, rest, etc.)
  • People-pleasing
  • Avoiding intimate relationships
  • Inability to make decisions
  • Believe your happiness depends on others
  • Take care of others’ needs, but not your own
  • Others’ opinions are more important than your own
  • Have difficulty asking for what you want or need
  • Go along with others vs. with what you want
  • Feel anxious or afraid
  • Not sure what you really feel
  • Take on moods or emotions of others around you
  • Overly sensitive to criticism

How to Set Effective Boundaries

If you find that you may have loose or rigid boundaries, it’s OK. Try not to judge where you are right now. Rather, approach it with curiosity and openness. Read through the following suggestions and find one thing you can start with today. Give it a try and see how you feel. Remember, it may be uncomfortable at first as you are learning a new skill. Stick with it. You deserve to be treated as valuable, which is what healthy boundaries communicate. You may need to remind yourself that this is a form of loving self-care and you’re doing the best you can. You don’t need to feel guilty for what you need.

  1. Know yourself.This means knowing your innermost thoughts, beliefs, feelings, choices, and experiences. It also means knowing and connecting with your needs, feelings and physical sensations. Without knowing your true self, you can’t really know your limits and needs, i.e., your boundaries. This will also help you to more clearly define your needs when boundaries are crossed.
  2. Be flexible.Having healthy boundaries doesn’t mean rigidly saying no to everything. Nor does it mean cocooning yourself from others. We are constantly growing, learning and evolving as human beings.
  3. Stay out of judgment.Practice having healthy compassion for others without the need to “fix” them.
  4. Let go of judgment about yourself.Easier said than done, but start practicing compassion and acceptance. When you can accept yourself for who you are, there is less need to hide your true self. A more positive inner world can help you feel safe with vulnerability. Connect with the voice of someone loving and nurturing and imagine what he or she would say to you in this moment instead.
  5. Accept the truth in what others say and leave the rest.Feel what you feel and don’t take responsibility for or take on the emotions of others. Give back their feelings, thoughts and expectations.
  6. Practice openness.Be willing to listen to others about how your behavior impacts them.
  7. Watch out for black and white thinking.Do you have difficulty saying no? Try, “let me think about it and get back to you.” Do you have to do x, y, or z or else? Try to find the middle ground.
  8. Pay attention to activities and people who drain you and those who energize you.Protect yourself by saying no to those who drain you or finding ways to reduce them through delegating, setting limits, or lowering perfectionistic standards. Add more energizing activities to your day instead.
  9. Pause.When you feel the urge to (insert compulsion here), stop and check in with yourself. What are you feeling? Can you allow that feeling to be present without acting on it for the moment? What do you need? Dig deep and see what comes up for you. Take five or 10 deep breaths if need be, focusing on exhaling completely.
  10. Get clear on what you value and desire.What do you really want or long for? What is truly important to you in your life? Get clear on your most important values. Use your values to guide your decisions vs. others’ opinions or expectations. Use this to help you find what is missing from your life.
Rachel Eddins is a therapist in private practice in Houston, TX. She specializes in helping men and women claim their worth, trust themselves, make peace with food, and live a purposeful life. Visit her at www.eddinscounseling.com.

APA Reference
Eddins, R. (2014). Keeping Good Boundaries & Getting Your Needs Met. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 21, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/lib/keeping-good-boundaries-getting-your-needs-met/00018789

Scientifically Reviewed
    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 6 Feb 2014
    Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.

The Pressure of Valentine’s Day

The Pressure of Valentine's DayIt started as soon as the Christmas decorations came down. Valentines and those heart-shaped boxes of chocolates appeared in stores, and ads for jewelry began running on TV.

The pressure is on. If you are partnered, you’re supposed to make a big deal of February 14. If you’re happily (or unhappily) single, you’re not off the hook. There are cards to send to your parents and siblings and best friend and even your dog. There’s no way around it. It’s in the atmosphere. If you don’t buy something red and heart-shaped for someone, you’re going to hurt someone’s feelings and contribute to the fall of the economy. You’d best get busy buying.

Make no mistake — Valentine’s Day is big business. According to CNN, Valentine’s Day sales will reach $18.6 billion this year. People will spend an average of $130.97 per person. (Remember: That’s an average. Some people will spend much more; others much less.) 145 million Valentine cards will be sold. $4.4 billion will be spent on diamonds, gold and silver. That’s a lot of peer pressure.

Yes. It’s wonderful to have one day a year set aside to celebrate love, to do something special for those we most cherish and to feel cherished by someone who cares enough to send the very best. But what’s good for the cash registers in card, candy and gift stores isn’t necessarily good for a relationship. Expectations for the day, and pressure to be more in love, more romantic or further along in a relationship than they are can derail a couple’s relationship, not enhance it. How can you and your sweetheart get through February 14 with your wallet and your relationship intact?

1. Make sure you are on the same page about what you expect.

We are as happy or as disappointed as our reality matches our expectations. If she expects jewelry and he turns up with a box of chocolates, she’ll feel let down. Ditto if he expects she’ll make a fancy dinner and she suggests takeout.

Furthermore, surprises aren’t always as successful as we’d like them to be. They can be overwhelming or out of step with the other person’s idea of the stage of the relationship. If he shows up with diamonds when she thinks they are only at the card stage, both will be embarrassed and uncomfortable. It’s equally true if she puts on a fancy dinner and he shows up in sweatpants and without having shaved. To prevent the heartbreak of disappointment or a serious misstep on what is supposed to be the day of love, have a clear conversation ahead of time about what you would both feel is appropriate to honor the day.

2. Match your expectations to the stage of the relationship.

The card companies and the jewelry stores would like us all to do the day up big. But a relationship that has just begun is different than a relationship that is in full bloom, and that is different than longtime married love. Please go back to no. 1. Do you both have the same idea of how the stage of your relationship should be celebrated?

3. Match your expectations to your budget.

Love isn’t measured in dollars. It’s measured in thoughtfulness, tenderness, and a bit of romance. One special flower can mean as much as two dozen long-stemmed roses. One perfect chocolate from the chocolate store can be just as special as a heart-shaped box. If you both want a big, expensive night on the town and can afford it, well, why not? But if either one of you would find that embarrassing, wasteful, or overwhelming, maybe you should rethink the idea.

4. Don’t expect your partner to be different just because it is Valentine’s Day.

Shows like The Bachelor and store displays seem to imply that everyone believes that romance means hearts and flowers and mushy romance on February 14. Some people simply aren’t romantic that way. Some people even manage to forget, despite all the store displays, that February 14 is Valentine’s Day.

If you’re with someone who just doesn’t get it – and especially if you do – it’s not necessarily personal. It may be that your guy or gal is preoccupied, has bad memories associated with the day, or doesn’t philosophically go along with a holiday that was made big by the card companies. To prevent hard feelings or a fight, please take care of yourself and go back to no. 1. (P.S.: If “forgetting” the day is personal, do take care of yourself and rethink the relationship.)

5. Don’t, don’t, don’t propose on Valentine’s Day unless you are absolutely sure of a “yes.”

If you get a “no,” or even an “I’ll think about it,” every Valentine’s Day for the rest of your life will be clouded by the memory of hurt and disappointment. (Have I mentioned that you should go back to no. 1?)

6. Focus on the love, not the “shoulds” that are in the cultural atmosphere.

There are lots of ways that people show their love. Some people are creative and capable of flamboyant surprises. Others are quieter and express their affection in simpler ways. There’s no right way to observe Valentine’s Day. There’s no right way to show love. Back to no. 1.

What matters on February 14, and indeed every day of your relationship, is that you feel loved, respected, cherished and cared about by someone whom you love, respect, cherish and care about. So talk it over with your beloved. Make something happen – together – that is as personal and loving as your relationship.

Happy Valentine’s Day.

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. She writes regularly for Psych Central as well as Psych Central’s Ask the Therapist feature, and has published the insightful parenting e-book, Tending the Family Heart.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, M. (2014). The Pressure of Valentine’s Day. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 20, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-pressure-of-valentines-day/00018834

Scientifically Reviewed
    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 11 Feb 2014
    Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.

Power, Control & Codependency

Power, Control & CodependencyPower exists in all relationships. Having power means to have a sense of control, to have choices and the ability to influence our environment and others. It’s a natural and healthy instinct to exert our power to get our wants and needs met.

When we feel empowered, we can manage our emotions, we believe that we matter and that we can affect outcomes. We have a sense of efficacy in our lives, rather than being at the effect of others and circumstances. Instead of reacting, we can act because we have an internal locus-of-control.

Impaired Power

In contrast, many of us may feel powerless and victims of outside forces. We can feel like our destiny is out of our hands. Some of us voluntarily give up our power to others. We may feel uncomfortable with exercising our own power, and believe that we will alienate others. Instead, we might react to others, defer to their wants and needs, and have trouble making decisions and initiating independent action. We might feel like we’re being mean or raising our voice when we merely state what we want or don’t like. This impaired sense of power is common among codependents and stems from:

  1. A habitual external focus
  2. Shame and low self-esteem – not feeling worthy
  3. Dependence and lack of autonomy – excessive need for a relationship
  4. Lack of assertiveness and deference to others’ decisions
  5. Discomfort with power and a belief that it harms relationships
  6. Fear of rejection and abandonment
  7. Need for others’ love and approval to feel content and happy
  8. Denial of needs, wants, and feelings
  9. Having unreasonable expectations of others
  10. Lack of self-responsibility (victim-blame mentality)

Power Imbalances in Relationships

Many relationships have power imbalances. If we’ve denied our power and don’t express ourselves for any of the above reasons, it’s natural for someone else to fill the vacuum. Often in codependent relationships, one partner – sometimes an addict, narcissist, or abuser – wields power over the other. Usually the acquiescent partner attempts to exert influence in indirect or passive-aggressive ways, such as withholding. Chronic lack of power can lead to depression and physical symptoms.

In somewhat healthier relationships, both partners vie for power in ongoing power struggles. These typically revolve around money, chores, child care, and negotiating how and with whom time is spent. To avoid conflict, some couples segregate domains where they each exercise more control. Historically, mothers ruled the roost and fathers earned more and controlled finances. This continues in many families despite women’s improved earning power, especially when they have young children.

Traditional roles are changing and becoming more egalitarian. Men are participating more in child care and parenting. By working or having power outside the home, women learn that they can function outside the marriage. This potentially gives them greater power within the relationship. Some partners become resentful when everything isn’t split 50-50, but more critical is the perception of unfairness and imbalanced power. This can happen when our feelings and needs are ignored. We don’t feel listened to or that our input matters. We feel unimportant and resentful. When we have no influence, we feel disrespected and powerless.

Shared Power

Self-worth and autonomy are a prerequisite to sharing power and feeling entitled to express our desires and needs, including needs for respect and reciprocity. In a healthy relationship, power is shared. Both partners take responsibility for themselves and to the relationship. Decisions are made jointly, and they feel safe and valued enough to be vulnerable. They’re able to say what they like and don’t like and what they want and won’t tolerate. Relationships and intimacy require boundaries. Otherwise, risking honest self-expression feels too threatening. Boundaries ensure mutual respect and the happiness of both partners.

Codependents and Power

Codependents generally grow up in families where power was exercised over them in a dominant-submissive pattern. Their needs and feelings were ignored or criticized. When personal power and self-worth isn’t encouraged, we come to believe that power and love can’t coexist. Power gets a bad rep. We’re afraid of our own power and to feel safe and loved learn to accommodate and please others. For girls, this can be reinforced in families where women and girls are viewed as second-class or not encouraged to be assertive, autonomous, educated, and self-supporting.

On the other hand, some children grow up to decide the best way to feel safe and get their needs met is to exercise power over others. This also presents problems, since it breeds fear and resentment and makes our partner withdraw or behave in passive-aggressive ways.

Many codependents have never learned to be assertive or how to problem-solve. They’re unable to know and assert their wants and needs or make decisions, often even for themselves. They relinquish control over themselves and often defer to others or don’t act at all. Assertiveness is empowering, but requires a foundation of autonomy and self-esteem, both difficult for codependents. However, assertiveness can be learned, and doing so builds self-esteem.

Control is one of the primary symptoms of codependency – control of self or others. It becomes confused with power. Because codependents lack a sense of power in their lives, instead try to manipulate and control others. Instead of taking responsibility for their own happiness, which would be empowering, codependents’ focus is external. Rather than attend to their needs directly, they try to exercise power over others and control others to make themselves feel okay on the inside. They think, “I’ll change him (or her) to do what I want, and then I’ll be happy.” This behavior is based on the erroneous belief that we can change others. But when our expectations aren’t met, we feel more helpless and powerless.

How to Become Empowered

Love and power are not incongruous. In fact, love doesn’t mean giving up oneself, which eventually leads to resentment. Love actually is the exercise of power. To claim our power requires learning to live consciously, taking responsibility for ourselves and our choices, building self-esteem, and asking directly for our needs and wants. As we learn to express ourselves honestly and set boundaries and say no, we create safety and mutual respect, allowing our partner to do the same. See my ebook, How To Speak Your Mind – Become Assertive and Set Limits.

Becoming more autonomous also is important, not only to build self-esteem. Autonomy assures us that we can survive on our own. That knowledge makes us less dependent on others’ approval. This allows couples to be less reactive. They’re able to share their feelings, hear each other’s needs, problem-solve, and negotiate without becoming defensive or blaming. Sharing our vulnerability – our feelings, wants, and needs – actually strengthens our true self in an environment of mutuality and trust. Thus, asserting our power permits safety and allows for intimacy and love to flourish. When we feel powerless or unsafe, love and the health of the relationship are threatened.

Darlene LancerDarlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, specializing in relationships, codependency, and addiction. She has a broad range of experience, working with individuals and couples for more than twenty-five years. Her focus is on helping individuals overcome obstacles to leading fuller lives, and helping couples enhance their communication, intimacy, and passion. She is a speaker, freelance writer, and maintains private practice in Santa Monica, CA. For more information, see whatiscodependency.com, where you can also get the FREE ebook, “14 Tips for Letting Go.”

Find her book Codependency for Dummies at Amazon and Barnes and Noble. You can follow her on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/codependencyrecovery

APA Reference
Lancer, D. (2014). Power, Control & Codependency. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 19, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/lib/power-control-codependency/00018636

Scientifically Reviewed
    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 16 Jan 2014
    Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.

Much Better Than Taking Her To Dinner…

FILE THIS ONE UNDER *TOTALLY MIND-BLOWING*:

Did you know there are 12 WORDS you can say to ANY woman (within minutes of meeting her) that literally FORCE HER TO BE INTERESTED IN YOU… even to start *FANTASIZING* about YOU?

Listen, there was a time I didn’t believe this one, either.

But then I used it, and it worked. And then it worked AGAIN. And AGAIN and AGAIN.

Amazing…

This one’s like a “magic spell” for making women stop… listen to you… then start seeing you as the guy they might want to be with TONIGHT!

Learn how to “cast your spell” here:

http://www.DoubleYourDating.com/catalog/ApproachingWomen.html

*** DATING QUESTION FROM A READER ***

Hi David, love your newsletters, always remind me the great points I read in your book…You recently wrote:

“If you buy a woman enough dinners, she may begin to feel some AFFECTION for you…but food and gifts will never lead to ATTRACTION. Big difference.”

So what do we do after the first date of tea and stimulating conversation?

I figure that at some point, I would like to go to dinner with a new girl. Should I just let them pay for theirs?

I did that last time, since we were just becoming friends, I wasn’t that into the woman and didn’t want to look like I was trying to impress her (since I wasn’t trying to impress her), and she also has her own business and I could tell she wasn’t struggling.

Dinner has been my main date approach in the past, and I have become the Wuss in most cases!

I recently came up with a good line for a girl at the Farmers market who told me I should eat my greens…I told her she should come over and cook them for me!

She didn’t know how to respond, but I think she liked it by her smile. I’m gonna hit her up next time to be serious about that request, I think she can probably cook up some nice greens to go along with my nice Ahi Tuna dish…

A.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

I want to share an interesting story about a conversation I had this evening.

I was talking with, of all people, my MOM about the topic of “men paying for things for women” and it was fascinating to me to hear her perspective.

Without hesitation, she said that she believes that men should pay for everything, and if they really like a woman that they should SUPPORT her as well.

Of course, I burst out with, “YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING!”

After we shared a laugh, she said, “No, I’m not kidding.”

And she wasn’t kidding, either.

My own mother believes that it’s just part of being a “gentleman and good suitor” to pay for dinners, gifts, and even shelter for the woman he desires.

I immediately replied with {paraphrased}:

“This kind of sounds to me like you believe that men should pay women to give them attention, affection and sex.”

At this point I think she remembered that I write books about this kind of thing and she gave up.

But the thing that really got my attention was that she REALLY BELIEVES THAT MEN SHOULD PAY FOR EVERYTHING.

IN FACT, SHE BELIEVES IT AT THE “WELL, OF COURSE! THAT’S JUST THE RIGHT THING TO DO” LEVEL!

Heavy man, heavy.

No wonder I was such a loser before with women.

OK, I love my mom and mean no disrespect towards her…

But let’s talk about the real world for a second.

Here are a few things that I believe about how things work in general when it comes to women and dating…

LISTEN UP, THESE ARE HUGE:

1) People in general, MALE OR FEMALE, intuitively know when they are being “pursued.” As soon as we know that we have something that someone else wants, the price starts to go up. Economics 101.

2) When the price starts going up (translation: she realizes that you really like her and she starts playing hard to get, making you “prove” yourself, etc.) you start to LOSE CONTROL RAPIDLY.

3) When you lose control, you have a couple of basic ways you can respond: A) Pursue her harder, giving her even MORE control OR B) Giving up. (Neither of these options sounds very good to me.)

4) An alternative is to NEVER START GIVING UP CONTROL IN THE FIRST PLACE.

5) One way to do that is to stay away from things that put a woman into the “courting” mode of thinking and behavior.

6) Asking a woman to dinner and then buying is probably the absolute most certain way to put a woman in the state of mind that she is being “pursued” (with the possible exception of stalking her, which I strongly discourage).

By the way, I’m not opposed to the idea of buying dinner for a woman.

I’m opposed to the mindset that you put her into when you buy it.

Does this make sense to you?

If so… EXCELLENT.

In fact, if you “get” this point, here’s how I want you to build on that knowledge right now:

I want you to start to succeed with women (like you never imagined YOU could ever do) by doing just 1 new thing in your life…

I want you to adjust your “mindset” with women so that you always broadcast CONFIDENCE and CONTROL…

… instead of neediness, desperation, fear, nervousness, and anger!

Once you know how to make this adjustment by doing just a few small things (like NOT taking a woman to dinner) I absolutely GUARANTEE IT:

* Your FAILURE and FRUSTRATION with women will quickly become a thing of the past.

* Every part of your dating life will begin to run more smoothly

* You’ll feel like you are on “auto-pilot” as you make all of the right moves with women (and in life in general) every time.

If all of this sounds good to you…

HAVE A LOOK AT THIS RIGHT *NOW*:

http://www.DoubleYourDating.com/catalog/DeepInnerGame.html

Once you do, you’ll realize that your lack of success with women may really just be a “symptom” of a deeper problem… one that MANY men have.

In the meantime — before I get into the SPECIFICS of what you need to do instead of buying a woman dinner — let me share what I used to PERSONALLY think whenever I first met an attractive woman…

I always thought something like this:

“Well, she seems nice, but in my experience you never know what a person is like until you get to know them better. So what am I willing to do to find out?”

After some thought, it usually came down to… “I guess I’d be willing take the time to have a cup of tea with her to find out more.”

Know why?

It was because the investment of going for a cup of tea is just about all the chance I’M GOING TO GIVE HER THE CHANCE TO PROVE TO ME THAT SHE’S MORE THAN JUST A PRETTY FACE.

I never think, EVEN FOR A SECOND, that I need to buy her dinner so she’ll sit and talk to me.

No way.

Incidentally, or not so incidentally, having an attitude that you need something other than yourself in order for a woman to like you is UNATTRACTIVE to women.

They can smell this kind of attitude and lack of self-worth.

Bad, bad, bad!

OK, so you get that I’m not real big on the idea of starting things off by paying for dinners and gifts.

“What should you do instead?”

I thought you’d never ask…

Well, first off, if you ABSOLUTELY CAN’T HELP YOURSELF and you just HAVE to take a woman to dinner, at least frame it as “I want to go out to this favorite restaurant of mine, and if you’d like to go you’re welcome to join me.”

Then if you decide to pay, it can be something you were doing for yourself, and you were being POLITE by paying for hers.

If you do this, make it clear that you’re there because you want to go there, and that it’s not to court her!

A much better idea is to be creative and avoid all of the things that scream “I’m willing to spend money to have your attention” (and therefore driving the price of that attention up).

Why not a walk in the park? Going to an art show? Going window shopping in an interesting part of town? Taking her with you to run errands? Taking her to a party that friends are throwing?

Here’s a hint:

DO SOMETHING THAT HAS INTERESTING CONVERSATION AND EXCITEMENT BUILT IN.

Sitting at a dinner table ALONE with someone that YOU DON’T KNOW is hardly “interesting conversation built in”. Think about it.

Take a moment right now and think of 10 things you could do with a woman that cost little or no money, but have all kinds of interesting conversation, adventure, and excitement BUILT RIGHT IN.

Then, just do some of those things!

This is great… you get to have fun, not look like a wuss, not put her in “courting” mode, and have interesting conversation built right in.

Added bonus:

You save $$.

Nice.

What I’m really trying to say here is don’t set up the idea that you’re paying for her attention.

And as for the gal who you met in the market..

I love the fact that you suggested she should come over and cook for you. Cocky and funny, very nice.

When she got that shocked look and couldn’t respond you might have said, “Oh, I didn’t mean to embarrass you…you can’t cook, huh? Well, that’s OK. It’s nothing to be ashamed of…”

These are the best moments to turn up the heat!

After that, just simply move to the “It was nice talking to you but I have to get back to my shopping…” Then, just after turning away, say, “Hey!…Do you have email?”

“Yes.”

“Great {pull out pen}. Give it to me.”

Then follow up with this email:

“Hey, nice bumping into you at the market today. After carefully considering it, I’ve decided that I can live with the fact that you can’t cook. I’ll just have to adjust. I’m busy tomorrow, but maybe the next day we can get together for a cup of tea and I can teach you a thing or two about this cooking thing. It’s really not that hard, and I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it in no time…”

By the way, I have no problem with the idea of having a woman cook for you. Just remember that if she does YOU NEED TO PLAY HARD TO GET!

Wait a minute; you need to do that anyway…

There’s only one place in the world I know of that you can learn all of this information quickly, easily, and thoroughly…

And that one place is my Advanced Dating Techniques program.

In this program, I’ll take you all the way through all of the things that you need to know in order to be successful with women…

…from theory to practice…

… from nuts to bolts…

… from meeting to dating to “getting physical.”

I’m talking ALL OF IT, including:

–A simple, top-secret technique you can use to permanently eliminate your fear and nervousness around women!!!

–The SHOCKING REAL REASON that a woman will sleep with one man on the first night… but make another man wait for MONTHS… or FOREVER. (Know this secret, and the choice is yours!)

–2 fast exercises to learn how to talk to women in a way that makes them feel INSTANT ATTRACTION (Watch “Advanced Dating Techniques” instantly online today, and get results TONIGHT!)

–A word-for-word script to use when you call a woman for the first time that GUARANTEES you’ll get a date with her!

–My famous 10-point “First Date Checklist” of everything a man NEEDS to go over before he goes out the door!

AND THE BIG ONE:

–How to use “The Kiss Test” to MAKE YOUR MOVE with a woman with 100% SUCCESS EVERY TIME!!!

You can check out more specific, great samples of all this (and MUCH, MUCH MORE) right here, so get on it:

http://www.DoubleYourDating.com/catalog/AdvancedSeries.html

OF COURSE… if you haven’t read my eBook “Double Your Dating: What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women” then you need to do that FIRST.

Go here to download and be reading within minutes:

http://www.DoubleYourDating.com/catalog/eBook.html

This book and the three bonuses that come with it are the FOUNDATION for success with women. Everything you read in these newsletters will make more sense once you have read the book!

I’ll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. For better or worse, life-changing success with hot women isnt all about “lines” and “techniques.”

It’s also about learning to FEEL like a “real man” when you’re around women… as in, ALL THE TIME… so you’ll never need “lines” and “techniques” again.

If *you* feel like there’s a “real man” trapped inside of you who just can’t get out… I have a program that’s “unlocked” that man for THOUSANDS of my students!

After watching my legendary “On Being A Man” Program just ONCE, you’ll stop worrying about success with women…

…or even thinking about how to make it happen…

… because SUCCESS WITH WOMEN will become a natural, AUTOMATIC part of who you are!

Don’t cheat yourself out of this feeling… click to learn more about my world-famous “On Being A Man” Program now:

http://www.DoubleYourDating.com/catalog/OnBeingAMan.html


Copyright 2012, David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks and/or service marks of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. All emails sent to David DeAngelo become the property of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. Read my privacy policy here.

The material contained in this and any other communication from David DeAngelo is an expression of opinion and is not to be construed as legal, medical or professional advice. This material may only to be used for personal entertainment purposes.


To ensure that you get my relationship advice newsletters each week, click here for instructions on adding me to your address book: Address Book Instructions


If you are under the age of 18, please unsubscribe from our newsletters and other communications by clicking on the link below, or by sending a written request to David DeAngelo Marketing Inc., 3960 Howard Hughes Pkwy, 5th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89169. To safely REMOVE your name and email address from our newsletter mailing, unsubscribe here.


If you have a question about these newsletters or anything else related to Double Your Dating, chances are it has already been answered on my Frequently Asked Questions page. This is usually the quickest way to get the answers you need, so always check my FAQ’s before sending us an email. Contact us.

Posted by at 8:09 AM

Video Tip: A Simple Way To Learn What Women Really Want

There’s 1 thing that guys WASTE more time trying to do (while FAILING miserably…) when it comes to women than anything else:

It’s trying to “read” a woman’s mind to figure out what she REALLY wants in a man.

But… what if you could actually DO it? What if you could GET INSTANT ANSWERS about what she’s really looking for?

Guess what: THERE IS — and it’s the subject of today’s VIDEO TIP.

Click the “play” button to watch my SPECIAL GUEST (dating expert LANCE MASON!) describe a shockingly simple way to find out *EXACTLY* what women want when it comes to “romance”:

Oh, and if you can’t see the video above, click here.

Hey Man,

I hear it from a LOT of discouraged, frustrated guys every day…

When it comes to figuring out what women are REALLY looking for in a man, it can feel like a mystery.

Like an unsolvable puzzle.

And, based on what you hear from so-called “relationship experts”… it can feel like a puzzle with CONSTANTLY CHANGING ANSWERS.

This is why I wanted you to have a look at a clip from my world-renowned “MAN TRANSFORMATION” program today…

In this segment, my special guest Lance Mason (legendary founder of one of the world’s TOP DATING-SUCCESS companies) shares a favorite “shortcut” for getting a look into the mind of a woman.

It’s a shockingly quick-and-easy way to find out what women are *REALLY* thinking when it comes to how they want a “real man” to behave!

This one’s also great because it’s a “secret” resource that hasn’t changed in 100 YEARS… it ALWAYS WORKS with women and ALWAYS WILL.

So forget what Dr. Drew and Dr. Phil have to say (seems they change their minds every week about what it takes to succeed in a relationship, anyway) and have a look at this tip from Lance Mason.

I LOVE THIS ONE. And since I made it part of my world-famous “Man Transformation” program, I know that you will, too.

Click the link below for *FREE* INSTANT VIEWING:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/special/videonl_simplylearnwhatwomenreallywant.asp

Your friend,

David D.


Copyright 2012, David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks and/or service marks of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. All emails sent to David DeAngelo become the property of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. Read my privacy policy here.

The material contained in this and any other communication from David DeAngelo is an expression of opinion and is not to be construed as legal, medical or professional advice. This material may only to be used for personal entertainment purposes.


To ensure that you get my relationship advice newsletters each week, click here for instructions on adding me to your address book: Address Book Instructions


If you are under the age of 18, please unsubscribe from our newsletters and other communications by clicking on the link below, or by sending a written request to David DeAngelo Marketing Inc., 3960 Howard Hughes Pkwy, 5th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89169. To safely REMOVE your name and email address from our newsletter mailing, unsubscribe here.


If you have a question about these newsletters or anything else related to Double Your Dating, chances are it has already been answered on my Frequently Asked Questions page. This is usually the quickest way to get the answers you need, so always check my FAQ’s before sending us an email. Contact us.

Posted by at 8:07 AM

The Theory of Opposites

Learn more

“The best way not to be lost is to be your own map.”
~ Theory Of Opposites

Have you ever questioned your choices? Have you ever wondered if there was a ‘life plan’ doled out by the universe that was going to execute itself, regardless of these choices? And have you ever thought that choice does exist and prevail – that your choices are effective in living the life you want to live? If this train of introspection is identifiable or desirable, Allison Winn Scotch’s new novel, The Theory Of Opposites, will absolutely bring you on a self-reflective journey.

Protagonist Willa Chandler Golden’s father is the bestselling author of Is it Really Your Choice? Why Your Entire Life May Be Out Of Your Control. “Accept inertia,” he says. “Once you have accepted that you can embrace inertia, that you can be pulled wherever life pulls you, merely close your eyes, and your perspective will change. Once you stop fighting change, change will find you.”

Willa and her friend set out to experiment with “the theory of opposites.” They aim to publish a book, attempting to counter her dad’s notions. What if you consciously choose to do the opposite of what you would normally do? Will it lead to an alternative road or another route?

While Willa embarks on figuring out where she stands, she must sift through some challenging circumstances of her own: losing her job, having a husband who decides to take a ‘break’ from their marriage and rekindling a friendship with an ex-boyfriend – an ex-boyfriend who resurfaces after he begins reevaluating his life.

The classic debate of destiny vs. free will is intricately woven throughout the novel. Scotch takes the ‘everything happens for a reason’ mindset to extremes, where inevitabilities exist, the universe has a pre-determined ‘master plan,’ and quite frankly, there is little to be done about it. Willa is heavily immersed in her dad’s widespread ideas. She doesn’t know what she really wants, or what she really believes in.

In the book’s beginning pages, she’s simply following the herd as a sheep. She shrugs at life’s happenings, assuming that she has zero control (which was difficult to witness as a reader, and as an outsider who thinks differently). However, as she continues on her quest, she starts asking herself, “What can I do now?” and “What’s next?” She’s trying to write her own map.

Perhaps certain curveballs in our lives are out of our control. Yet, can we still exert free will? Can we still choose how we respond? I think so. Our choices can culminate in what’s meant to be. In essence, we create our own destiny.

In an interview with sheknows.com, Scotch was asked where she personally falls on the destiny/free will spectrum. “I can’t believe that everything is meant to be, because I really do believe that the choices we make matter. But I also know that some things just happen: happy accidents and not-so-happy accidents. I guess those are part of the mystery of life,” she said.

Allison Winn Scotch’s Theory Of Opposites gives us a down-to-earth account of a young woman who’s struggling to find her place and authentic path. This read is for anyone who has ever contemplated the origin of how we navigate our way.

Psych Central’s Recommendation: Worth Your Time! +++

Your Recommendation (if you’ve read this book):

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Want to buy the book or learn more?

Check out the book on Amazon.com!

APA Reference
Suval, L. (2014). The Theory of Opposites. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 18, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-theory-of-opposites/00018634

Scientifically Reviewed
    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 16 Jan 2014
    Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.

Body Language That Turns Women Off

Ever wish you had “X-Ray” vision?

I’m not talking about seeing through walls, here.

I’m talking about being able “see” straight through ANY woman…to know what she’s feeling…what she’s thinking…whether she’s interested in YOU…how to take things to the next level with her.

I’m talking about seeing ALL OF IT…as CLEAR AS DAY…just by LOOKING at a woman.

This is “X-RAY” Vision that ANY guy can have (and achieve miraculous results using) once he learns a few simple secrets.

Get them here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/BodyLanguage/

Man, are you frustrated that despite knowing a few great “lines” or certain techniques for approaching women and getting their numbers that seem to work like magic for other guys.

YOU are still choking time and time again especially around women that you think are “out of your league?”

What is it that these other guys have that seems to work so well and so effortlessly for them? How do they get women to GRAVITATE to them without even trying?

If I were to guess, I’d have to say that the only reason you’re still having such a hard time when it comes to creating attraction and interest in a woman, it’s because there’s something going on SUBCONSCIOUSLY that you’re not even aware of.

You’re simply sending her the “wrong message.”

And you don’t even know it.

You might be coming across as needy, desperate, weird, too intense. But how would you know?

Right. You wouldn’t – unless she tells you to your face.

And that wouldn’t be any fun.

So here’s where I’m going with this.

I’m going to shed some light into this situation for you.

I’m going to teach you:

– The first and MOST IMPORTANT STEP you must take in order to eliminate the most common mental obstacles getting in the way of you having success with women a “whole body” technique that can REVERSE unproductive subconscious behaviors right now

– A 5-second technique to instantly get women to NOTICE YOU when you walk into a room, without have to say a word

– How your CHILDHOOD SECRETS may be negatively affecting the way your body feels when you’re with a woman. Yeah, I’m talking about your dad’s Penthouse magazines here

– The one thing you can do with your body — without touching her — that will make her think you’d be good in bed. This is the secret of men who you wouldn’t even THINK should be getting women. Amazing stuff.

– What to say in the first 10 seconds of approaching a woman at a bar or party to virtually eliminate the possibility that she’ll think you’re “creepy.”

– and a whole lot more.

It’s all here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/DeepInnerGame/

Believe me, if you’re still sitting around at home wondering why you can’t seem to get your game on no matter what you try, then you need to click this link above.

***SUCCESS STORY***

“If there are people out there who still don’t believe in the cocky & funny, QUIT DOUBTIN’ IT AND START WORKIN’ IT!

The other night I was at a burger joint near my office. It’s one of those grungy independent places that’s popular with the locals, and out of towners make a point to visit if they’re here for something else. The line had snaked around, and a group of three cuties was standing in front of my table. They were talking about what they’d heard, and one of them said she was looking forward to their fries.

Since I had a bunch of fries in front of me, I made eye contact and gave my fries a Vanna White flourish with my hands. She said, “Wow those look good. Can I?”

I offered her one of my fries. She dipped it in my cup of ketchup, and right as she popped it in her mouth, I looked her in the eye and said “By the way, I double-dip.” In the space of two seconds, her expressions ranged from shock at my brashness, to wondering whether she should be grossed out, to laughing.

I knew I could have gotten her e-mail/number… and the thing is, I didn’t even want to, because I’ve been seeing a solid eight. Sure, there are hotter, but until recently I would have thought she was entirely out of my league. And I ALWAYS bust her balls. She’s always coming up to me, saying “Gimme kiss”. I think for a second and say, “Umm…no, but thanks!” And then she’s enthusiastically kissing me. Or more.

I’m not the hottest guy out there. I’m pretty fat, actually. But women hate how desperation smells, and if a beautiful woman sees that you’re not looking for just anyone who’ll return the conversation, and that you’re not intimidated by their looks, that’s GOLD, man, GOLD.

In fact, it’s even worked for me at the office. Now, yes, here you have to be more careful. And it doesn’t substitute for competence. But my boss sees I’m not intimidated, and I get stuff done. In fact, today I just landed a $5K raise.

You must be tired of hearing it…well, hear it again. Dave, you da man.

E Michigan”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Nice!

Well, I think my favorite line in your email was…

“…women hate how desperation smells…”

Because this doesn’t make a whole lotta sense to most of the guys who read it, let me do the honors of breakin’ it down for ya…

When someone says something like this, what they’re trying to say is that there’s something about “desperation” that women pick up on…but it’s not easy to describe.

Desperation comes across in all kinds of subtle ways, from how you talk to a woman, to the eye contact that you make, to how often you call her.

Women can “smell” it because women are approximately TEN TIMES better at reading body language than men. Your body language says everything about you to a woman…so, if you want to get better at attracting women, you’d better start paying attention to and taking control of it.

Start with your posture. Lift your chest.

Lean back, not forward.

Leaning forward is usually a “needy” signal.

Leaning back is usually a signal of strength.

Slow down your movements.

Fast movements convey nervousness and skittishness.

Slow movements convey self control and strength.

It’s a good idea to take some time and study the body language of guys who are successful with women. Watch closely, and pay attention to EVERYTHING.

Even though something doesn’t SEEM like it’s important, it probably is.

I have a good friend who holds his drink a certain way when he’s talking to a woman that he’s interested in.

He does it almost every time.

Is it important?

You do the math.

More great tips for triggering attraction and “chemistry” can be found here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/SexualCommunication/

***COMMENTS FROM A WOMAN***

“Hey Dave -

Ok, I can’t help myself. I’ve got to comment again. I commented last week in response to a writer who was disturbed with your methods of meeting women. And now this week, I find another, equally amusing halfwit who just doesn’t get it (the one you affectionately called a “crack smoker”..hehehe).

Is it me or the rest of the world? Jesus, people.

It’s not disrespectful, it’s not meant to be hurtful or demeaning. It’s called TEASING…it’s a playful, flattering form of teasing.

Let me give you an example of a guy I met recently, from a female’s point of view — one guy’s success story (and unless he gets your newsletter or has read your materials, he’s probably totally unaware of HOW he “hooked” me so easily). I met a guy online several months ago, we chatted for awhile and quickly discovered that we had a very compatible quick-witted sense of humor (he was cocky and very funny from the get-go…I loved it). Every time we talked on the phone, he’d find a way to bust my chops and make me laugh. (Sounds cliche, but “He had me at hello.” hehehe) He’d always point out some imperfection of mine and blow it all out of proportion and talk about how it just wasn’t going to work out because of all my flaws (kidding the whole time, of course)…one being the fact that I’m not particularly very well endowed in the chest region. A modest 38B. So after we met that first time, he walked me to my car that night, and as he turned to walk towards his car, he paused and turned back long enough to say “oh, and you’re right, you’re not very busty.” Shocked, I just said, “oh get outta here you *&$%@# ” and jabbed him in the arm. And I grinned the whole way home. And I couldn’t wait to see him again.

I hope you consider including this in your newsletter to encourage guys to keep trying your methods. THEY DO WORK! With the negative comments in the last couple of newsletters from “outraged” readers, I’d hate for any guy to second-guess that this stuff works. Because as far as I’m concerned, there just aren’t enough of you guys (cocky & funny) around. At least I can’t find ‘em.

J, in Maryland”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yeah, well I think that the REAL problem that the “halfwits” and “crack smokers” of past newsletters are having is that they don’t GET IT.

I’ve found that women HATE the idea that guys are doing ANYTHING “intentionally” to become more successful in the dating world.

Anything that has to be “learned”, really freaks some women out (as a side note, I’ve found that most of the women I’ve talked to in person about my ideas were OK with them. On occasion, a woman will freak out, but after they actually “get” what I’m talking about, they almost universally LIKE the ideas).

The REAL profound insight that I’ve had relating to this topic is that women will often SAY that they want one thing, but then, when they GET it, they seem like they don’t want it.

On the other hand, women will often SAY that they don’t like certain types of guys or certain traits, then they’ll turn around and SLEEP with one of these exact guys.

Keep in mind, we’re talking about women here. I don’t mean to pick on them…the fact is that GUYS have their own set of bizarre behaviors too. But, since everyone is reading these Mailbags to learn about how to attract women, we’re going to have to skip this discussion (Wink – Wink) of these exact guys.

And, for all the guys who doubt that what we’re talking about here “works”, just ask yourself these questions:

1) Is what you’re CURRENTLY doing working?

2) Isn’t it worth the risk to try ANYTHING else if there’s even a CHANCE that it will actually work?

Nice.

Thanks for your email.

***QUESTION***

“Hey Dave,

Been getting your newsletter for about two months now. Also got both your books and program. They’re just unbelievably superb!!!! The stuffs in your book and programs are so easy to be understood. It is like reading “How to double your dates for Dummies”. I was always nervous when I was around hot looking girls. Now, I actually have the confidence to walk up to them and ask for their emails/numbers. It’s such a big shift in such a short time. Composure is almost what the girls are looking for. Without it, they can sense you got no game. You really got the stuffs. It works wonders. I’m certainly still new to this and I am practicing everyday constantly.

I have no problems asking girls for the emails. I understand how the composure, voice tone and everything works. But this is my problem. Some girls actually say this exact same lines like “Why don’t you give me your email/number and I’ll email/call you.” I really am stuck after they said this. I just can’t figure out some C&F to say at this point to amplify the situation. I am ready to be enlightened by your teaching.

My new Sensei,

Big bow to you, E.F Canada”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

lol…I love questions like this one.

Yeah, when you start getting good at approaching women, you will start having all kinds of far-out things happen.

As a matter of fact, some of my favorite stories that my friends and I laugh about are about times that I started conversations with women.

Here, let me confuse you for a moment…

Let me give you a couple of different perspectives on your situation.

I have one good friend who has been with literally HUNDREDS of women.

He told me a story about a woman that said this to him. He asked her for her number, and she said, “Well, why don’t you write down your number and I’ll call you?”

He didn’t even hesitate…he shot back, “Don’t give me that SH**, write your number down!”

She smiled and wrote her number down.

One time, I was out talking to a girl…I asked her to write down her email and number, and she said, “You give me your number” etc.

I looked at her and said, “Never mind”.

Then, as the conversation went on, she started making comments about talking to me in the future, giving her my number, etc.

I just said, “Nah, you’re not serious. If you were, you wouldn’t be playing games with me, and you’d just give me your number”.

She wrote it down.

Funny enough, my standard response to “Why don’t you give me your number instead and I’ll call you” is to just look at her and say, “Write it down. It will be OK…” and then point to the paper.

That probably works about 50% of the time.

You have what I like to refer to as a “high quality problem”. Remember what you’ve learned in my program about what a woman is REALLY looking for. Then be it.

Just because a woman says, “Give me your number instead”, doesn’t mean that you’ve lost control. It’s usually just a test.

For more ideas about how to meet women and get their numbers, go here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/ApproachingWomen/

***COMMENT***

“OMG okay Dave,

I’m a female and have been reading your newsletters to try and figure out where guys get their “game” from. Now that I know it’s from you, I would like to say you’re a total genius. Like I’ve had guys use your tips on me and at first I’ve been like “what the hell” then later on in the conversation, we were exchanging numbers and kisses. you must be like a woman in disguise or something. you are so awesome.”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, one thing is for sure…I’m NOT a woman in disguise.

lol…

I don’t know many women who could explain this stuff the way I do.

Oh, and feel free to send your picture and phone number with your emails in the future.

If there’s one thing that’s better than a man recognizing my genius, it’s a cute gal recognizing it.

By the way, you said something that was very interesting in your email.

You said that when guys start using these techniques with you, at FIRST you respond with “what the hell”…but LATER ON you wind up kissing and exchanging numbers.

Very VERY interesting.

This is a KEY point that most guys just can’t grasp or work with. Thanks for laying it out.

***QUESTION***

“hello there. can u please let me know, what is meant by a wussy.? I’ve came across this word a lot, in ur newsletter, wussy, and wussies, but couldn’t figure out, what it means. I didn’t find the meaning of that word in the dictionary too. As you used in ur letter, Women aren’t attracted to Wussies what is meant by that. waiting for ur reply bye

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yes, I can explain the concept of what a “Wussy” is quite easily.

If you say things like “waiting for your ur reply”, you’re communicating like a Wussy.

If you don’t know what a Wussy is, you probably are one.

Guys who aren’t Wussies know what a “Wussy” is because they usually MAKE FUN OF THEM a lot.

I know, I know…I’m being harsh.

But, I used to be a BIG TIME Wussy. It was a problem.

I used to call women all the time, kiss up to them, give away my power to them, and every other WUSS-ISH thing you could do.

In other words, I’m an expert.

A Wussy is a guy who gives away his power to women, and behaves in a “submissive” way.

Don’t do this.

It’s the DARK SIDE, if there ever was one.

***QUESTION***

“David,

I’ve been reading your newsletter for about a month now and I respect your honesty and perspectives. The things you’ve said makes lots of sense and I have no doubts that they work. In fact, I have observed others use your techniques they and get remarkable results with the ladies. Now, when I read your newsletters, I thought to myself and realized that I have been somewhat using your “cocky and funny” techniques unconsciously…ie, teasing the girls, making fun of them but not putting them down. (I guess its part of my personality). I make some of the girls I work with as well as my customers laugh. The thing is, when I go out to a bar or a nightclub, or anywhere else for that matter, I tend to clam up for some reason. I might even give the impression to others that I’m a tight ass because I don’t open my mouth. I know I can keep the ball rolling once I have the girls attention. My problem is the ice breaker. The very first thing I say AFTER introducing myself, or even BEFORE depending on the situation. I feel like I don’t have any interesting things to say to start up a conversation. My question is how can I prepare myself to be more cocky per say? What ice breakers can I use and not look like a wuss at the same time? I try to listen in on the guys next to me pick up girls, try to hear what they are saying. But I’m hard of hearing and its quite hard in noisy situations for me to hear anything unless my ear is literally close. Interested in any perspectives and feedback you can give to start off.

Thanks A.W.G. – Illinois”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Most guys are afraid of approaching women and starting conversations.

When you say the words “ice breaker”, you ASSUME that a woman is going to respond to you “coldly”. You know, Ice = Cold.

The fact is that there are a certain percentage of women out there who are happy, open and receptive in general, and a certain amount that are cold, closed and NOT receptive.

I had a guy come to my last seminar in Los Angeles who went out and started approaching women.

He came back into the seminar the next day and told this story…

He said that he couldn’t believe how he let his past negative programming stop him from starting conversations with women. He had gone out and walked up to women, one after the other, and just simply said, “Hi, I’m out meeting people tonight, what’s your name?” and women were giving him all kinds of positive responses.

Just remember that most women will respond somewhere in the range of “neutral” to “positive” if you say almost ANYTHING to them.

Now, if you want to start conversations in bars and nightclubs and you just can’t get the nerve up to do it, try this…

Find a BUSY place near the bar where people are lining up to order drinks. Find a place where people are literally crammed together like sardines.

Work your way up to the bar at the BUSIEST spot, and either stand there, or get a chair there.

The idea is that you want to be where a lot of women will walk up to the bar during the evening and ACCIDENTALLY bump into you.

If you REALLY want to make this work for you, wear a loud or unique shirt…something that has a soft, “feely” texture.

Over the course of a few hours, some conversations will start BY THEMSELVES.

Women will say, “excuse me” and try to get past you.

Some women will ask you to order a drink for them.

Some will just bump up against you on accident and then apologize.

Take a few minutes, and think up some good responses that fit your personality…and have them ready.

Try:

“Look, if you wanted to start a conversation with me you could have just said, “hi”, you didn’t have to be violent about it.”

That should get you started.

The point is that there’s a way to put yourself in a situation that automatically sparks conversations. You just need to be ready when it happens.

This kind of thing should help you get past the fear and hesitation to start conversations on your own.

***QUESTION***

“David D.,

First off, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to put all of this material together. As a guy who is finally beginning to understand the game and is on his way to “get it”, I’d like to thank you. I’m still not completely to the place I’d like to be, but I’m on my way (being able to walk up to any woman who I’d like to meet and being able to secure digits and lead things the rest of the way from there). The ideas that I’m finding that really help me keep my focus (and not get too nervous/needy) are many from your advanced program that I purchased. ex- What they think of you is their business, and acting almost too comfortable around them. I’m also in the process of reading Comedy Writing Secrets by Helitzer and have 3 other books purchased (of those you recommended) that will be my next projects.

Okay, on to the comment and question. I’ve read recently that studies have shown (can’t remember if this was from Reader’s Digest or what) that even if you’re a shy person, acting outgoing will improve your mental health and get rid of that feeling of seclusion that many introverted people have. On to the question…in your Advanced program, the idea of congruence is mentioned several times, mostly as that you have to be congruent when you talk to a woman. This concept seems to be rather elusive and I was wondering if you could go into more detail about what “being congruent” entails.

Thanks, T.C. from Virginia”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Sure, the idea of being “congruent” when you communicate simply means to have ALL LEVELS of your communication “in alignment” with each other and “saying the same thing”.

If you’re asking a woman for her number, but you’re looking around nervously and hesitating, it’s not “congruent”.

On the other hand, if you’re saying, “Write down your email and number for me” while taking out a pen and paper…as if it’s the 147th time that you’ve done it, it’s CONGRUENT.

Most people don’t realize that they’re sending MIXED MESSAGES all the time.

Have you ever asked someone “What’s wrong?” and had them say, “NOTHING’S WRONG! Why does everyone keep asking me what’s wrong?”

That’s a mixed message. And it’s not congruent.

You want to line up ALL of your communication.

Your body language, voice tone, words, etc.

All of the different specific body language, voice tone, and gestures that I recommend in my programs have a single goal in mind: To help you be 100% CONGRUENT when you are communicating with women.

There are ways to use “mixed messages” that can create attraction, but make sure you’re doing it INTENTIONALLY when you do!

The more congruent you are, and the more you use the techniques that I’m teaching, the better your responses from women will become.

***COMMENT***

“Y’know, my mom actually wanted to comment on your program. She’s been teaching me and my brothers about what women REALLY want from men ever since I was very small. She’s been teaching us pretty much the same material that you cover in your book and advanced series (which I recently picked up by the way, I fell so much in love with the book I just couldn’t resist, it’s been GREAT!), and she just wanted me to tell you that you hit it right on the head! Her saying has always been pretty much: “Women don’t want a hard-ass, but women also don’t want a BITCH-ASS, either.” I have tried other dating success training, and t his one is by far my favorite. There’s…one… that I tried before yours. Theirs isn’t NEARLY as good as yours, because the techniques they teach are way to unnatural, too analytical, doesn’t let you be yourself at all, and doesn’t work for everyone in every situation. Your service is the best I’ve seen so far, because IT ALLOWS YOU TO BE YOURSELF, while HONESTLY sparking ATTRACTION in a female, and automatically DOES NOT work on a woman with a stick up her ass! I can tell you put a lot of work into this, you’ve defiantly touched many lives. Not just for men, but women too. Thanks David.

C.D. from Texas”

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Oh YEAHHHHH!

Dude, even your MOM endorses my stuff.

This is out of control.

You know, actually…you suck.

I wish that MY MOM would have taught me this stuff, instead of teaching me wisdom such as “You need to buy women more things” and “A man should always pay for things”, etc.

And any mom who would teach her son:

“Women don’t want a hard-ass, but women also don’t want a BITCH-ASS, either.”

…has my respect.

And to comment on your experience with the techniques and systems that others teach on how to meet women…

My guess is that 95% of the others who have written books on this topic or developed other programs are doing it for the MONEY alone.

In other words, their main focus is the CASH, and NOT helping guys improve with women.

Now, I certainly enjoy the cash. No argument there.

But my MAIN OBJECTIVE is to have the absolute BEST system and materials that are available ANYWHERE, at ANY PRICE.

I have spent a LOT of time, effort and energy to figure out what works to attract women.

Here’s the test:

Go download my online eBook, and order up one of my programs. You can get all to try out RISK- FREE.

THEN, go buy another book on the topic, or whatever else you can find (make sure it comes with a 100% money-back guarantee.)

My bet is that you’ll return everything else before you’ve even finished reading it (or listening, or whatever) and that I couldn’t pry my stuff out of your hands with a CROWBAR.

My stuff WORKS BETTER, and is easier to use than all the other stuff out there, period.

And, probably the MOST IMPORTANT benefit is something that was mentioned in this newsletter when you learn how and why women feel ATTRACTION, and you learn how to trigger it with your communication and body language, you don’t have to use a bunch of “unnatural tricks” or dishonest techniques that “feel wrong”.

I’ll teach you how to develop that “innate” or natural part of yourself that is already there… and give you the correct perspective and programming to get RESULTS.

Try it, you’ll like it.

And, if you don’t like it, you’ve lost nothing…because all of my stuff comes with a “try it before you buy it” zero risk policy.

So, do this…

Go download my online eBook “Double Your Dating” right now, and you’ll be reading it within a few minutes. You can download it here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/eBook/

And go order a copy of my Advanced Dating Techniques program. This program is the most complete, in-depth program in the world for learning how to overcome fear, approach women, get numbers, get dates, meet women online, and take things to a “physical” level without fear or rejection.

Go watch some great preview video clips of it, and get all the details here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/AdvancedSeries/

I’ll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. Make sure you take a few minutes and look through all of the different programs I’ve created to help you succeed with women. You can look at all of them right here, plus watch some fantastic free video clips right here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/Catalog/


Copyright 2012, David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks and/or service marks of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. All emails sent to David DeAngelo become the property of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. Read my privacy policy here.

The material contained in this and any other communication from David DeAngelo is an expression of opinion and is not to be construed as legal, medical or professional advice. This material may only to be used for personal entertainment purposes.


To ensure that you get my relationship advice newsletters each week, click here for instructions on adding me to your address book: Address Book Instructions


If you are under the age of 18, please unsubscribe from our newsletters and other communications by clicking on the link below, or by sending a written request to David DeAngelo Marketing Inc., 3960 Howard Hughes Pkwy, 5th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89169. To safely REMOVE your name and email address from our newsletter mailing, unsubscribe here.


If you have a question about these newsletters or anything else related to Double Your Dating, chances are it has already been answered on my Frequently Asked Questions page. This is usually the quickest way to get the answers you need, so always check my FAQ’s before sending us an email. Contact us.

Posted by at 8:12 AM

Video Tip: A Simple Way To Turn Online Chat Into Actual Dates

Update:

Most of my students now “get” that the Fastest, Easiest, most Pain-Free way to meet amazing women is on the Internet…

But I’m also hearing that some of you still feel a bit uncertain… even clueless… about how to turn pings and online chat into actual dates.

If this sounds like you, here comes a Free Video Tip that you need to watch right now…

Click the play button to learn a quick, easy way for taking your “online game” into the real world:

If you can’t see the video above, just go here to start watching now.

Hey Man,

You’ve heard me say it before:

Once you learn a few simple secrets and techniques, the internet INSTANTLY becomes your own private, totally risk-free “dating playground.”

It’s a “guaranteed-success destination” where ANY guy can go to meet tons of great women… entirely at will… completely hassle-free and Results-Guaranteed.

It’s the easiest place to learn how to “approach” women.

It’s the best place to have attraction-building conversations with women.

Above all, the internet is the only place to learn it all completely free from fear of “blowing it” or experiencing painful, face-to-face rejection.

All of which leads to why I’m writing you today…

Sure… any man can follow my simple, step-by-step, “machine-like” methods for meeting (and creating irresistible attraction) with great women online…

But once you learn to make it happen, what happens next?

It’s the question I get more than any other when it comes to online dating:

“How Do I Turn My Jammed Inbox Into Actual Dates?”

Well. This what we call a “champagne problem”…

Once you have it, you’re already well on your way to life-changing success with women.

Even better:

Once you have tons of great women “hooked” on you because of the way you attract, meet, and chat with them online…

… there’s then a Simple, Step-By-Step method for converting that success into Actual, Off-The-Hook, Real-World Dates.

Frankly, some of these methods require more than a 2-minute video clip to teach. (That’s what my Full “Meeting Women Online” program is for.)

But for now…

To get you started (and show you how simple it is to convert online interest from women into actual Dates) I want to share a particularly quick, easy method for making women you meet online want to meet you In Person.

Go here now to watch a free video tip that’s all about it.

It’s guaranteed to work.

Your friend,

David D.


Copyright 2012, David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks and/or service marks of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. All emails sent to David DeAngelo become the property of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. Read my privacy policy here.

The material contained in this and any other communication from David DeAngelo is an expression of opinion and is not to be construed as legal, medical or professional advice. This material may only to be used for personal entertainment purposes.


To ensure that you get my relationship advice newsletters each week, click here for instructions on adding me to your address book: Address Book Instructions


If you are under the age of 18, please unsubscribe from our newsletters and other communications by clicking on the link below, or by sending a written request to David DeAngelo Marketing Inc., 3960 Howard Hughes Pkwy, 5th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89169. To safely REMOVE your name and email address from our newsletter mailing, unsubscribe here.


If you have a question about these newsletters or anything else related to Double Your Dating, chances are it has already been answered on my Frequently Asked Questions page. This is usually the quickest way to get the answers you need, so always check my FAQ’s before sending us an email. Contact us.

Posted by at 8:06 AM

Online Dating, Beautiful Women, And Insecurity

NOTE: I’d like to teach you the direct method of communication with women called Body Language… that will get a woman to notice you, feel attraction for you, and even APPROACH you. Find out more here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/BodyLanguage.html

***QUESTION***

Hey wassup?

I have just reread your book again and I took a look at all my online profiles that I have posted in the past. At first I didn’t want to believe what was in the ebooks but as I thought about it more and more I realized I was totally on the wrong path. Then I was always wondering why no one ever responded to my profiles so I took a look at the profiles after gaining the knowledge from your ebook and realized they stank with wussyness that would make girls in a three mile radius run away fast! Well I changed my profiles and added a lot of C & F to it and just basically had fun with it and I can’t believe the success I have gotten from it. I am getting a bunch of e-mails a day from girls (I have gotten more e-mail in 2 days then I got in 4 months with my old profile). I also have around 5 dates set up for the next three week period!

Thanks again for all your hard work and from turning me from a momma’s boy into a real man (that virtual slap to the face really woke me up! just don’t do it so hard next time!).

TY

PS. Just a comment I find it funny that sometimes I will see a girl that is about an 8 or 9 and when I talk to them for a while I find out a lot of them see themselves as just average or below average. Any insight as to why some hot girls (or cold whichever) see themselves as this when they could probably get any guy they wanted?

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Before I answer your great question about why beautiful women see themselves as “just average” or “below average” and what it means to you, I want to comment on your email… and in particular, the quote:

“Then I was always wondering why no one ever responded to my profiles so I took a look at the profiles after gaining the knowledge from your ebook and realized they stank with wussyness…”

I do believe that you’ve coined a new term.

In the future, whenever anyone says that a particular guy’s behavior “Stanks Of Wussyness” or “Stank With Wussyness” they will have YOU to thank.

Or stank.

Or whatever.

And I think that the reason I liked this one quote so much is that it just plain RINGS TRUE.

Women can SMELL that thing called WUSSYNESS.

And the fact that women can actually detect the STRONG STANK OF WUSS even through an INTERNET PROFILE says something even MORE profound…

It says that the concept of being a WUSSY is an “INNER” idea.

In other words, it’s something that originates in your MIND. It’s a combination of beliefs, as well as the communication of those beliefs through words, body language, etc.

Think about that for a moment.

A woman can actually SMELL A WUSSY from an INTERNET PROFILE ALONE.

And as soon as you changed your profile around to get rid of the Wussyness in it, your responses changed INSTANTLY.

So what is it about this particular set of qualities that make up a WUSSY that women just aren’t attracted to?

Well, I really think that it all comes down to the fact that ATTRACTION isn’t based on LOGIC.

It’s not a “decision.”

You’ve heard me say that “Attraction Isn’t A Choice” probably a bazillion times now.

Just realizing that women can’t “choose” who they feel attracted to, makes you also realize that there are qualities that women DO feel attracted to AUTOMATICALLY.

On the flip side of the coin, there are many qualities that INSTANTLY turn a woman OFF as well.

When you put many of these “anti-attraction” qualities together, you’ll usually find a Wussy.

Women KNOW that they aren’t attracted to guys who are Wussies.

And they have an amazing “WussDar” system that is finely tuned to recognize those subtle little hints that say, “I’m A Wuss!”.

Women have all kinds of little “code words” and body language cues that they use with each other to describe the process of NOT being attracted to a particular guy because he acts like a Wuss.

If you see two women talking, and one is describing a date she had with a guy who was a Wuss, it might go something like this:

Girl #1: “Yeah, he was NICE, and he was good- looking… but when he showed up he had flowers with him… and then before we could even get out the door he was asking me if it was OK with me if we went to the restaurant he chose… an hour into dinner he asked me if I thought that the date was going OK…”

Girl #2: “Ohhh, Ewwww. That’s not gonna work…”

Girl #1: “Yeah, I know. Why do most guys have to act so needy and stupid? If I wanted another girlfriend, I’d go meet WOMEN…”

Girl #2: “So how are you going to cut him loose?”

Girl #1: “I’m just not going to call him back, and he’ll get the hint… I hope. But, then again, probably not. He’ll call me every day for a week, and when I reach him I’m going to have to make up a story about being busy with work… you know the deal. Eventually he’ll get the hint.”

Girl #2: “Why don’t guys get it?”

…and on and on.

From just a few little clues, the friend KNEW that this guy STANK OF WUSSYNESS.

From there on, it was just ASSUMED that he didn’t have a chance.

It was over.

The conversation was on to “How are you going to get rid of him?” NATURALLY.

This is how women actually respond to Wussy behavior and communication… INSTANTLY.

And the worst part is that once you’re mentally branded a Wussy in a woman’s mind, you’re in that category FOREVER.

Getting out of the mental Wuss category is one of the hardest things you can ever TRY to do.

It’s not even worth the effort.

The key is to not get into the Wuss category in the FIRST PLACE.

And while you’re in the process of not being a Wussy, you need to make her feel ATTRACTION as well.

More on that later.

Now I want to address your question…

You asked why many attractive women see themselves as “average” or “below average”… when they could probably get any guy they want.

These are the kinds of questions that I think about a lot.

The crazy things that people say and do really fascinate me.

And I’m especially interested in these areas of psychology that just don’t seem to MAKE SENSE.

Attractive women get a lot of attention.

In fact, for an attractive woman, attention can actually become like a DRUG.

I have personally known and dated some very attractive women… models, actresses, dancers, and so on.

And I can verify that the most attractive women are also the most INSECURE women when it comes to their attractiveness.

Illogical?

Maybe.

But think about it this way…

If you’re an unusually attractive woman, your looks become your IDENTITY.

Everyone that meets you mentions your looks.

Every guy you date tells you how beautiful you are.

Every day, everywhere you go, you have people talking about how you look.

But MORE importantly, the more you hear it, and the more you think about it, the more you begin to realize that there are OTHER women who are MORE attractive than you.

Since “looks” is the topic that’s always coming up, you’re always thinking about it.

If a woman with a bigger chest walks by, you immediately think “maybe I’d be more attractive if I had a bigger chest” and you feel insecure.

If a thinner woman walks by, you think that maybe you should be thinner.

If a woman with a different hair color walks by, you wonder if your hair is the right color.

This kind of thing triggers INSECURITY every time it happens.

Trust me.

This kind of thing gets WORSE the MORE attractive a woman is…

Because the most beautiful women are often MODELS… and they get to go from one audition to the next… and see literally hundreds and hundreds of other “competitive” women who each have some feature that’s just a little “better” than theirs.

Now imagine what it’s like to be a woman with “average” looks.

If your looks are “average”, you don’t hear about them so much.

Your looks aren’t the topic of every conversation.

Your looks aren’t your “identity” the way they are for the beautiful girl.

And since you don’t think about your looks as much, and don’t talk about your looks as much, you don’t feel that deep insecurity as often when an attractive woman walks by.

Reality can be pretty weird sometimes.

It’s different for each of us.

You can put a beautiful woman in a room with 100 guys who all think she’s the hottest thing they’ve ever seen… but she’ll still feel like “nothing special” and that she looks horrible that evening.

All the compliments she hears will roll off her like water rolls off a duck’s back… because she’ll detect the subtle tone of Wussy, and she will be thinking about how one of her girlfriends just got a boob job and how insecure she feels now because guys look at those new boobs a lot.

The reality of THIS situation is that very few women have the “whole package.”

The combination of looks, personality, emotional stability, and intelligence is RARE.

You’re going to have to date quite a few women before you’re going to find that one fantastic one who really has it all together.

One of the things you’ll notice about attractive women is that they REALLY respond to Cocky & Funny comments… especially about LOOKS.

They tend to “get it” faster, because you’re touching a sensitive spot.

And by the way, when you make fun of a “super hottie”, it is big-time fun for the whole family.

It instantly levels the playing field.

It says, “Hey, I’m not one of the guys who is affected by your looks… and I’m not going to act like I need your approval” INSTANTLY.

It says, “all the right things” all at the same time… and it makes women laugh as well.

There are a LOT of different things that don’t make any “logical sense” when it comes to the world of women and dating.

Unfortunately for most guys, these things will always be a mystery.

For most men, the idea of being able to meet and date as many interesting, attractive women as they want will always be a fantasy… but never a reality.

This sucks, because it doesn’t have to be that way… you don’t have to just accept your current level of success with women and dating.

Until now, there have been almost no options when it came to learning how to get this area of your life handled…

Well, the good news is that I’ve spent a lot of years now personally figuring all of this stuff out.

I’ve figured out how to make women feel ATTRACTION by using body language and other communication… and it’s really not that hard.

But, like any other skill that’s valuable, it’s not something that you can learn in 2 minutes.

It takes a little practice.

The GREAT news is that instead of taking several YEARS of research, reading, and trying crazy stuff that doesn’t work (like I did), you can get the benefits of my “banging my head against the wall” research… and go straight to the good stuff.

My Advanced Dating Techniques program is the ULTIMATE training program for this stuff. Not only did it take me YEARS to learn all of this stuff in the first place, and figure it all out, but it also took me literally HUNDREDS of hours of my time to put this particular program together.

I really designed this thing from the beginning to be the absolute best training available in the history of the world on how to meet and date women.

If you read some of the feedback in these newsletters and on the web site, I think you’ll find that quite a few guys agree that it’s pretty damn good.

But I want YOU to be the judge.

My offer is still available: Go to my web site and order it for a risk-free trial. If you don’t like it, I’ll give all your money back. I’m convinced that after you start watching it and start learning from it, you’ll send me an email with a success story.

The details are here, along with some good samples:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/AdvancedSeries.html

If you’d like to focus on ONLINE DATING, then I recommend that you start watching my “Meeting Women Online” program right NOW.

It’s JAM-PACKED with powerful techniques for meeting women online… anytime, 24-hours a day, 7-days a week.

As I’ve mentioned to you, I used the internet a LOT when I was first learning how to meet women… and it gave me a HUGE advantage.

Now you can learn all of the most powerful ways to use email, instant messengers, dating sites, social networking sites, and everything in between… to attract the kind of woman you want.

Go check it out here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/MeetingWomenOnline.html

And of course, if you haven’t downloaded your copy of my online eBook, you need to get that immediately. It’s the place to start, and you can be reading it in literally a few minutes from right now. It’s here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/eBook.html

I’ll talk to you again soon

Your Friend,

David D.

P.S. Don’t forget to check out all of the programs I’ve created to help you learn how to attract and meet women. My programs cover ALL aspects… from “Inner Game” stuff like how to overcome fear and a limiting self-image, to specific techniques like how to approach women, how to meet women online, and how to make sure that your conversation creates ATTRACTION.

PLUS, they’re all available for INSTANT online viewing, so you don’t have to wait to start learning all this stuff. Check them all out here:

http://www.doubleyourdating.com/catalog/index.html


Copyright 2012, David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks and/or service marks of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. All emails sent to David DeAngelo become the property of David DeAngelo Marketing Inc. Read my privacy policy here.

The material contained in this and any other communication from David DeAngelo is an expression of opinion and is not to be construed as legal, medical or professional advice. This material may only to be used for personal entertainment purposes.


To ensure that you get my relationship advice newsletters each week, click here for instructions on adding me to your address book: Address Book Instructions


If you are under the age of 18, please unsubscribe from our newsletters and other communications by clicking on the link below, or by sending a written request to David DeAngelo Marketing Inc., 3960 Howard Hughes Pkwy, 5th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89169. To safely REMOVE your name and email address from our newsletter mailing, unsubscribe here.


If you have a question about these newsletters or anything else related to Double Your Dating, chances are it has already been answered on my Frequently Asked Questions page. This is usually the quickest way to get the answers you need, so always check my FAQ’s before sending us an email. Contact us.

Posted by at 8:08 AM